Father is coming home from work, takes off the coat, goes in his corner and open the computer to read the sport news and see the newest gadgets. The bigger son is in his room playing in network an “awesome game” with his friends. The little girl is dressing Barbie girls online because she can dress them faster then in real life and has more accessories. The mother is in kitchen preparing a quick dinner because she cannot wait to watch the newest episodes of her favorite movie.

You will think I am exaggerating. Maybe I am, a little bit, but nowadays families do not have one computer they have two or three. It is ok to have more computers and to be an active Internet user, but what I want to point here is that for people is a must to interact with each other. And if your children are playing online when do they go out to play with other children the old games?

How many of the parents know that children spending too much time at the computer face real social problems? To be able to read and judge social signal from others as well as regulate their own, children need real-time interaction. However, there is not just about integration in society. Children will also:

• Become extreme irritability especially when limits on use are imposed
• Sleep less
• Loose interest in social or other activities
• Avoid talking with friends and parents
• Ignore school activities and lessons

I think a parent should not wait until some of the signs above can be find in their children’s behavior. The most of them are following their parents’ pattern. That’s why you should better choose to spend a nice evening playing with your children than surfing online.

Parents and teachers to blame
For Mr Bakker the root cause of the huge growth in excessive gaming lies with parents who have failed in their duty of care. 87% of online gamers are over the age of 18. From that age, help is something they need to seek for themselves, because as you know parents no longer have the legal right to intervene.

For those who are younger, intervention may be the only solution. That means even sometimes literally taking a child away from a computer, removing them from the game for a period of time until they begin to see there are other choices. If parents aren`t there for them, they are more likely to isolate themselves in virtual worlds.

“This gaming problem is a result of the society we live in today,” Mr Bakker told BBC News. “Eighty per cent of the young people we see have been bullied at school and feel isolated. Many of the symptoms they have can be solved by going back to good old fashioned communication.”

At least 10 hours a day playing
George [not his real name] is an 18-year-old gamer being treated at the Keith Bakker`s clinic in Amsterdam. He was spending at least 10 hours a day playing Call of Duty 4 until he sought help at the centre.
“Call of Duty was somewhere I felt accepted for the first time in my life,” he says. “I was never helped by my parents or my school. At the clinic I also feel accepted and have come out of myself.”
Read more about George`s case, here.

More posts about this issue in blogoshere.